A. They'd arrest you and charge you with assault.
OK, that was a bit of a no brainer that question.
But what if it was a POLICE SCOTLAND OFFICER who did the punching?
Would he be arrested and charged with assault?
Aha, now that's different. If the person doing the punching is a police officer, he doesn't get arrested and charged.
Instead, he gets off with it being recorded as "excessive force", not assault.
It's a similar scenario when Police Scotland "unlawfully detain" someone.
If you find yourself wrongly arrested and thrown in to a jail cell for a few days, untrustworthy Police Scotland will describe that as a "quality of service" matter.
Honestly, you couldn't make this stuff up!
The double-standards that Police Scotland apply is astounding. Bottom line here...when it's "one of their own" who breaks the law, things get handled differently.
In the case of the poor guy who found himself banged up in a cell for several days for absolutely nothing, not only did he have his complaint dismissed by police as just a "quality of service" matter, the Police Investigations and Review Commissioner (PIRC) found that the officers involved even tried to keep the complaint "hidden".
The PIRC noted that Police Scotland regularly fail to report allegations of officers committing crimes to prosecutors. Why? Oh that's simple. It's because it allows police to investigate THEMSELVES rather than passing allegations on to the COPFS.
But have no fear folks, The Assistant Chief Constable has jumped to our rescue. ACC Speirs says that Police Scotland "works tirelessly to promote public confidence in policing" and that police are "fully committed" to the Scottish governments reviews of complaint handling.
In other words, business as usual.