Saturday 4 June 2016

Chief Inspector Stephen Stiff's Subbuteo Law

Before the recent Scottish Cup Semi-final football match, Chief Inspector Stephen Stiff of Police Scotland sent a hard hitting message to fans who like to watch the game in their local pub, telling them that police will be watching them.

He advised that "Offenders don’t necessarily need to attend the game to attract a football banning order if convicted for a football-related offence, and we will assess circumstances closely and pursue all legal avenues to prevent future offending."

It all seems fair enough on the face of it - after all, football hooliganism and sectarianism is intolerable and should be stamped out.

The problem with CI Stiff's comments however are that we already have laws against people behaving illegally in pubs. There are already many existing laws against assaulting others, breaching the peace, causing fear and alarm, the list goes on.

So why is Chief Inspector Stiff so keen to hammer home that the particular offences his officers will be looking to arrest you for are football related offences and not the other wealth of offences we already have on our statute books?

The answer is simple.

Chief Inspector Stiff and his officers from untrustworthy Police Scotland just want to arrest lots of people. It's what they do. And the new football related offences allow him to do that.

History shows us that every time a new law comes in to force it always gives police more powers.


History also tells us that every time police are given new powers they always abuse those powers.


Police Scotland do not see their job as helping and protecting the public. They see their job as one of TARGETING the public and arresting as many of them as they can for anything they can. In their world they think that lots of arrests shows that they're doing a good job.

The football offences powers were given to the police to allow them to arrest anyone misbehaving at a football match.

But Chief Inspector Stiff and his cronies have now twisted that law around to make any wee pub with a telly in the corner the same as a football ground. Untrustworthy Police Scotland will use any excuse they can to arrest as many members of the public as they can. It's their sole purpose.

Twisting the law on offensive behaviour at football matches to try and make a wee village pub become a football ground is stretching it a bit.

In fact it's ridiculous.

But hey, if it gives them an excuse to arrest more people, it's unimportant to them how ridiculous the whole thing may be.

So, dig out the subbuteo and I'll meet you down the boozer.

But beware, I used to be a whizz at subbuteo so watch your language if I beat you.

Or I'll be calling Chief Inspector Stiff who's rules on offensive behaviour at pub football matches are just as stiff as his name suggests.

And just as stiff as the wee plastic subbuteo men on the pub table that he likes to call a football pitch.